We Had a Baby Naturally After 6 Years of Fertility Issues

We Had a Baby Naturally After 6 Years of Fertility Issues


I am so happy to announce the birth of our little girl Ava. She is now three months old. If you’ve been following along you may be wondering “Why did you not post about your pregnancy at all?” There were a lot of reasons I took a break from blogging after I found out I was pregnant. The main reason I took a break from blogging was to focus on being in the moment with my pregnancy. I reduced as many stressors as possible in order to be physically and mentally as well as possible. But I am very excited to get back into blogging again.


In my previous post you may remember I was talking with a doctor out of state about the possibility of Mini IVF out of state, as well as his keto diet he suggested to help me become more fertile. I was able to lose about 20 pounds doing intermittent fasting and avoiding junk food. I think losing weight helped me, but what I think helped me conceive more was that I had previously gotten surgery to correct my septate uterus and uterine scarring from Asherman’s Syndrome. I was born with a septate uterus which could have contributed to my previous miscarriages. I am so thankful for that doctor who was trained well enough to spot on the HSG Xray image when all my other doctors could not.


I will admit this pregnancy was really hard on me emotionally. I was experiencing a lot of anxiety because I was so used to every pregnancy turning into a miscarriage. Throughout most of my pregnancy I felt as if I was always waiting for something bad to happen, because that’s all I ever knew with pregnancy. I miscarried six times before and I also had a failed embryo transfer, so in total I consider that to be seven heartbreaking losses of children I could have had. I’ve had a hard time wrapping my brain around the amount of loss I’ve experienced over these past six years, and I think it’s something that is a process. I’ll never “get over it” but rather I will learn to live and cope with it better over the years.


So how did this pregnancy go? As I mentioned, I experienced a lot of anxiety, which I feel was normal considering all the loss I experienced before. I also had some scares during my pregnancy. I have high blood pressure normally when I’m not pregnant, but oddly enough my blood pressure dipped so low during my pregnancy I almost fainted about half a dozen times during my second trimester. I later learned that for many women blood pressure dips low in the second trimester. My doctor advised me to stop taking my blood pressure medicine because of this and I started to feel better. She told me that my blood pressure would probably go up again in my third trimester, which it did.


I had a few other scares. Because of my blood pressure issues I was told to look out for signs of preeclampsia. At one point my face swelled up on one side and I was worried it was preeclampsia so I called my doctor and they recommended I go to the hospital. The hospital determined it was a blocked salivary glad. They told me to eat sour candy to get me to salivate more and to reduce the swelling. That tops the weirdest doctor recommendation I’ve ever received but it actually worked. I was chewing on different sour candies and my face went back to normal.


The biggest scare I had during this pregnancy was that I was having contractions at work and felt really, really sick. It turns out I got Norovirus from my husband, who had been sick just before me. I was having full-on contractions, seven minutes apart, and I was only in my second trimester. I was terrified of losing this baby. The Norovirus made me so sick from all of the throwing up I was doing that it actually triggered the contractions and left me extremely dehydrated because I could not even keep down any water. I decided I had to go to the hospital for help at that point. They hooked me up to an IVF and gave me nausea medicine. Thank God I started to feel better. I was in the hospital for several days until I went home. Unfortunately Mom got Norovirus too after I had it. We think that maybe my husband first got the Norovirus from a food order he got, which caused all of us to get sick. I’m so thankful to the hospital for taking good care of me during such a scary time.


All throughout my pregnancy I had to give myself a shot twice per day for my blood clotting disorder MTHFR. I was used to doing belly shots (not the belly shots you might do in a bar…haha) during IVF rounds in the past. I was on Lovenox for most of my pregnancy and then near the end of my pregnancy I was taking heparin shots. I found out soon after I started the heparin shots that I was really lucky to get them when I did because there was a heparin shortage due to supply chain issues relating to COVID. I saw so many posts in different Facebook groups about how women were unable to get the heparin they needed during their pregnancy. I was grateful that I had the exact amount I needed to get by until my induction date.


I was scheduled to be induced one day before my due date. I was induced due to my blood pressure and blood clotting disorder, so they could monitor the whole labor and delivery process. I needed careful monitoring because hemorrhaging could happen, or my blood pressure could have gone too high or low in my case. 


The birth itself started off not too bad, I was having contractions I didn’t even feel but the monitors were picking up. But then the contractions became really extreme. I told the nurse that I was ready for my epidural. She reassured me that the anesthesiologist was in the next room and would be helping me with my epidural shortly. But “shortly” was not enough time. I began having extreme contractions, to the point that I was screaming in pain “Something isn’t right! Help me!” I was so scared and in such pain that the nurses called my doctor in to check me again.


I went from 1cm dilated to giving birth in just under 2 hours. I had no epidural either because there was not enough time. Before I knew it the doctor was at my feet telling me that I needed to push. It was an extremely fast birth and the pain was so immense. It was not at all how I though my birth would be. I thought it would be a long drawn out process like my Mom said her birth was with me. The only thing I was processing in my birth was the pain.


But I was reassured by my nurse and doctor that my baby girl was okay, I felt so relieved. When I was able to feel the weight of my baby girl on my chest after she was brought into this world it was such an amazing feeling, words can’t describe. Before I knew it, my husband was holding up his phone taking a picture of the three of us. My first picture with my baby is of her tiny hand wrapped around my finger. He snapped a few more pictures to document the very special first moments with our daughter.



Shortly after the joy we felt, there was concern for a lesion they found on my daughter’s back. After several days in the maternity ward the lesion was getting worse and they were concerned that it might be related to something going on with her spine. I was an absolute mess with my emotions, thinking that my baby girl might have serious spine issues. The doctors had to transfer her to the NICU to monitor the issue with her back as well as the concern they had for her low-birth weight. At one point in the NICU her weight dipped down to a tiny 4 pounds, 13 ounces. 


I have never cried so many times in my life. I was crying all the time, worried sick for my baby. But after about one week in the NICU her mysterious lesion was determined to not be spine related, and there was no other medical explanation other than maybe it was trauma from the birth, possibly her back was pushing up against a pelvic bone they thought. They had ran so many labs and tests on her that that was the only explanation they came up with. I was just relieved it wasn’t spinal related.


I was so happy when her weight went up again too. She was back to her birth weight of 5 pounds, 2 ounces by the time we left the hospital. She was little, the size of a premie baby, but she was considered “term” and normal otherwise. I was glad to put the NICU in my review mirror and to now focus on being a new Mom on my own. I was so thankful to all the NICU nurses who helped me learn how to take care of my fragile little girl. With their help I felt more confident that I could take her home, without all of the wires she had been hooked up to most of the time at the hospital.


The next chapter of our story was “new parenthood,” and this too was also incredibly hard. I became so incredibly sleep deprived that I was starting to unravel physically and emotionally. I had insomnia so bad that I began having auditory hallucinations. I was diagnosed with postpartum depression. I got help with medication while I was in the hospital so that I could get back on my feet. 


Thankfully I had a lot of precautions put in place ahead of time, preparing for the possibility of postpartum depression. Thankfully the hospital helped me to get on the right medication to reduce the voices down. I am also talking with a therapist to help me process everything.


This is the point in my story where I want to stop and talk directly to my readers about the stigma of maternal mental health. If you have any concerns at all about your mental health during or after pregnancy, get help from a therapist, doctor, and even hospital if you need it. You can even call a crisis line or your health insurance’s nurse hotline. Reach out for help from people you trust. Do anything and everything to get help and do not keep it to yourself. The stronger your support system the more likely you will get back on your feet more quickly. There is no shame in getting help, because getting help will also benefit your baby. Don’t suffer in silence.


So as you can tell my pregnancy story, birth story, and new parent story is full of many trials along the way. But through all the chaos, I am so happy to have our little girl here with us today. She is growing well and is a normal weight. She is a nice chunky baby who loves to laugh at daddy’s funny faces and enjoys cuddling in mommy’s arms. My baby girl’s smile makes everything absolutely worth it.

Weight Loss Series Week 6: 100-Mile Goal Met, The Dreaded Plateau, Egg Retrieval Before Frozen Embryo Transfer?, & A Turn of Events

Weight Loss Series Week 6: 100-Mile Goal Met, The Dreaded Plateau, Egg Retrieval Before Frozen Embryo Transfer?, & A Turn of Events

Last week I got a little lazy with tracking my calories and keeping up the exercising, and it showed on the scale. But for this new week, and new month, I am looking forward to getting back in the swing of things. I want to try to keep the momentum going of changing my lifestyle to become healthier. I am brainstorming some ideas to try breaking my current plateau. 


Disclaimer: All content and media on the Hoping For Baby website is created and published online for informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice and should not be relied on as health advice.


Catch-up on Previous Weight Loss Series Posts

Weight Loss Series Week 1: Fertility Clinic Closed, Focusing on Health

Weight Loss Series Week 2: 100 Miles in April Challenge & Online Infertility Group

Weight Loss Series Week 3: The Difference & BFFs with My Treadmill

Weight Loss Series Week 4: Variety is the Spice of Life & Virtual DIY Walk of Hope

Weight Loss Series Week 5: Tough Week, NIAW, & Mini-Goal Met

Countdown Until Target Weight Date: 4 months & 25 days (as of 5-6-2020)


Weight Loss Series (4)


100-Mile Goal Met

I am happy to announce that I did it! I was able to complete the 100 Miles in April Challenge that my work participated in. I was kind of lazy in my last week compared to the other weeks, but I completed the challenge just in time! I’m looking forward to doing this 100 mile challenge again for the month of May. I think if I were to change my approach for this next month, I would try to be more consistent throughout the month instead of taking several days off from exercising and trying to make up for the lost time in long workout sessions. Other than that, I really enjoyed the challenge. It definitely got my butt off the couch more.




I already started my mileage for this month, Kurtis and I went for a drive out to Portage and walked the Blue Ice trail which was really nice. Near the beginning of that trail were these surreal looking trees that had moss clinging to the branches. I told him they looked like Dr. Suess trees as we stared up at them. He said it reminded him of the trees he saw in Oregon, very green like that. 



Our recent walk on the Blue Ice trail in Portage, Alaska. It was cool to see the moss growing up the branches. See more photos of our hikes on Instagram @hopingforbabyblog


Further down the trail it opened up into a beautiful, scenic river. It was a wide river but was also very calm, with the sun shimmering off the water. I loved how the mountains were in the background with snow still covering the tops. This hike made for some great pictures. My goal for this summer is to get out more and discover new trails. We’ve driven past this trail before but this was the first time we actually walked it. 



The Dreaded Plateau

So this previous week I was starting to slip back into some of my old habits, and the scale was proof of this. Dang it! I wouldn’t say I was fully indulging like I used to, but I was getting a little too loosey goosey with how I was doing things. I stopped tracking my calories and I was working out less. The scale has held steady and I didn’t lose any weight recently.

I’ve told myself I’ve got to get back into the swing of things because I still have work to do on getting healthy. I started brainstorming some ideas on how to challenge myself in different ways so I don’t revert back to my old ways. Sunday I decided to do mini-fast to help me get back on track. 

Another idea I have is to challenge myself to improve my running speed. I want to improve my time for completing a 5K (or 3.1 miles). I haven’t focused on my time much before, but in general when I do alternating jogging and walking I average about 1 hour to complete 3 miles. So if I can shave that time down that would be great. My goal is to see some weekly progress with this time. Although the pandemic has shut down organized walks and running events, I’d still like to focus on this for myself. 


Egg Retrieval Before Frozen Embryo Transfer?

One of the big questions I’ve been thinking about lately is whether I should do an egg retrieval before my FET. Why would I do this? Well, my fertility clinic in Seattle is still closed and it’s not possible to transfer my embryo now. I found the clinic called CNY, based in New York, has been doing fertility treatments and is not shut down. I was already planning on going with CNY in a year or two (depending on if I get pregnant with my embryo from Seattle), so I am debating whether to go ahead and do the egg retrieval in New York. 

I have low ovarian reserve and a low AMH level, so time is of the essence for me. The longer I wait to do fertility treatments the less chance of having a healthy baby. I’ve heard that is precisely the reason for many clinics choosing to stay open, because they have some patients with certain diagnoses that if they do not have a baby now, they may never get that chance. If anything, I want to at least freeze my eggs. But ideally I’d like to freeze some embryos in New York, prior to transferring my Seattle embryo.

Earlier this year, I called up my Seattle clinic and asked them about the process of transferring my husband’s frozen sperm sample to CNY. They told me that I would need to become an established patient first at CNY before they could start that process. There is a fee to ship the specimen because it requires special handling in the cryopreserved container. I can’t remember the amount they quoted me to ship it but I think they said several hundred dollars, compared to all the other fertility treatments that is just a drop in the bucket.  

The idea of wasting an egg each month with my menstrual cycle does not sit well with me. Natural conception during this waiting time is not an option for me, because the likelihood of another miscarriage and risk of health issues for me would be high. I’ve had three different doctors advise me against trying on my own again. So yeah, natural conception is out the window. But maybe if I am able to “bank” some new embryos during this pandemic, I won’t feel like I’m wasting time just sitting here waiting for my Seattle clinic to open. I have a phone consultation with CNY on May 15th so maybe they will be able to schedule me for an egg retrieval before the Seattle clinic opens.  


A Turn of Events

I wrote everything you just read the other day, in preparation to post it on Tuesday. But there has been a recent turn of events as far as my fertility plans. I was lying in bed this morning with these thoughts weighing on me:

“How am I going to afford to go to New York right now to do an egg retrieval while my Seattle clinic is closed?” 

“Will I have to take out a personal loan to afford another cycle?”

“Will I hear back from anyone today about a second job?”

“What if the pandemic sees a second wave of cases and I need to cancel my egg retrieval in New York?”

“When will I be able to do my FET my one embryo?”

So most of those questions I didn’t have an answer for. But I thought I could at least tackle one question right away. Before I even got out of bed, I decided to call my Seattle clinic and ask them if they had any idea when they would reopen. The guy who answered said he was just with the answering service because they were all in a meeting, and that he had no idea when they would reopen. Dang, still no answer.

Today marked one month since the last time I received any update from my clinic. I decided to send out an email asking my medical team if they knew when they might reopen. I quickly got a response back form my nurse who let me know that they decided to reopen for women over 25 and for those with an AMH level below 1.0. I’m both of those! We sent a couple messages back and forth and I am all set up with starting my FET process again. 

I am over the moon excited to be starting up again. I told myself that if my Seattle clinic was not open by the time I had my phone consult with CNY, then I was going to proceed with my egg retrieval in New York. My one and only little embryo is finally going to be transferred. My nurse is creating my calendar of medications today. I already have all of my meds from before when I was originally scheduled to do my transfer on April 24th. I used none of my meds, and none of them have expired, and for those reasons I am grateful for not having lost any money on meds like other women have experienced.

My hopes are way up right now and I’m hoping that nothing will interfere with this process again. The only thing I can think of getting in the way is that my flight might be cancelled or delayed. The reason I think this is because I’ve had family and friends who’ve tried to come back home from out of state and their flights got delayed several times, and this was multiple people I’ve talked to. I think my best bet is to arrive in Seattle several days prior to my FET, just in case my flight gets cancelled or delayed. 

Since we all know fertility meds tend to bloat us because we retain a crazy amount of water, I’ve decided to pause my Weight Loss Series for now. I’m still going to be focused on getting as healthy as I can before my FET. I’ll be starting back up with my FET posts here shortly, so keep an eye out for new posts about my FET. Those posts will be a continuation of where I left off prior to the COVID clinic shut downs. In other words, I’ll be starting back up with FET Week 13.



Most recent weight loss from last week, went from 188.8 to 187.2. 1.6 lbs lost from previous week.


Screenshot 2020-05-06 at 4.06.45 PM


Mini Victories for the Week

Keeping up with my goal of trying to walk some new trails.

Made a plan for getting back on track with weight loss. 

Kept myself accountable by writing about weight loss plateau here. 


Work in Progress

Try to break out of the mid-180s weight range. I tend to get stuck around this weight. 

Start tracking calories again and stick to 1200 per day.

Track my initial time for my first timed 5K.

Weight Loss Series Week 5: Tough Week, NIAW, & Mini-Goal Met

Weight Loss Series Week 5: Tough Week, NIAW, & Mini-Goal Met

So for whatever reason this week proved to be more challenging than the previous four weeks. I was doing pretty well for a while but I was starting to slip up a bit these past few days. I told myself from the beginning of this weight loss series that the goal is not perfection, but to aim at meeting my goals around at least 80% of the time. Because “80% of the time” is a 100% improvement of how I was doing before all of this.


Disclaimer: All content and media on the Hoping For Baby website is created and published online for informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice and should not be relied on as health advice.


Catch-up on Previous Weight Loss Series Posts

Weight Loss Series Week 1: Fertility Clinic Closed, Focusing on Health

Weight Loss Series Week 2: 100 Miles in April Challenge & Online Infertility Group

Weight Loss Series Week 3: The Difference & BFFs with My Treadmill

Weight Loss Series Week 4: Variety is the Spice of Life & Virtual DIY Walk of Hope

Countdown Until Target Weight Date: 5 months & 1 day (as of 4-28-2020)


Weight Loss Series (3)


Tough Week

I think part of the reason this week was a little tougher was that my body was getting exhausted from working out so much. I kind of hit a wall of exhaustion. I took a day off to recover and then another, and then a third day. It’s not the end of the world. I just need to re-evaluate how I am doing things and aim to find a good balance. I want that balance to be about reasonable expectations and consistency. 

I’m going to have this week be a “test” of working out twice in a day, as opposed to doing one long workout session like I was doing. We’ll see how it goes, maybe it will be even better than what I was doing. I was working out 1-2 hours all at once 6 days per week. But my body finally said, “Naw, I’m going to curl up on the couch and make you immoblile for a bit.” I want to listen to my body but also challenge it. I think working out twice per day might be more reasonable for me. Wish me luck!



NIAW stands for National Infertility Awareness Week, and it was held April 19th through April 25th this year. I recently started becoming more active on Instagram (follow me @hopingforbabyblog) and I was blown away at how active the infertility community is during this week. There were so many posts from people of all walks of life dealing with infertility. I liked that each day of the week there was a theme. One day people were posting photos of their pets, another day was photos of those who have supported them, and Wednesday was photos of people wearing orange for NIAW. It was cool to see. I think maybe next year I will be a bit more involved with the photos. I didn’t realize until halfway through the week there was a theme for each day. I saw a few people mentioning their health changes they have made that helped them improve their fertility. 

Some women seem convinced their weight loss was the reason they were able to smile into the camera while holding their baby, and maybe that’s true. But the more I learn about infertility the more complex it seems. When I reach my weight loss goal I’m not going to have inflated expectations of being able to have a baby. It would be nice if it were that easy, but I see so many women of all shapes and sizes that struggle to have a baby. But if I can improve my odds even just a little bit of having a baby, at least I know I did everything I could. Plus I’d have the added benefit of not feeling so bloated, which is a good thing right?


Mini-Goal Met

Although near the end of the week I ran out of steam, I am happy to share I met my goal of 20 miles for the week. I had pledged to donate 50% of the miles I walked this week to RESOLVE’s Virtual DIY Walk of Hope to raise funds during National Infertility Awareness Week. I just got done donating tonight. Even though money is a bit tight for me at the moment, I figure this small amount is able to help out a bit with RESOLVE’s mission to provide infertility education and services to those experiencing infertility. Even if you missed out on the walk from last week you can still donate to RESOLVE.



This accomplishment has planted a seed for me and I am considering doing something similar over a longer period. I think that would help me to keep my momentum going. I’m thinking of selecting one or several infertility foundations to donate to, based on exercise and health challenges. I’m going to meditate on it and think about how I am going to execute this. Maybe I will select one foundation per quarter possibly. I’ll let you know when I decide.


Screenshot 2020-04-28 at 10.49.30 PM

Credit: 100 Miles Bonus Challenge. So close, almost to my 100 mile goal for April.



Darn it! Went up a bit with my weight. Oh well, there’s always next week.



Screenshot 2020-04-28 at 11.08.49 PM



Mini Victories for the Week

Walked 21.5 miles this week for the Virtual DIY Walk of Hope and donated today.

Became more active in the NIAW events on Instagram.

Applied to Fertility IQ grant and CNY grant. 


Work in Progress

Gained a little weight (doh!) but still motivated to keep going.

Try exercising 2x per day instead of a long session like I was doing.

Get back on track with doing 1200 calories per day (missed a few days).

Weight Loss Series Week 4: Variety is the Spice of Life & Virtual DIY Walk of Hope

Weight Loss Series Week 4: Variety is the Spice of Life & Virtual DIY Walk of Hope

This past week I’ve been trying to mix up my workout routine. I recently read that if you are doing more than one hour of exercise most days of the week, it’s good to add variety to your workout routine. It helps to work different muscles in your body which can prevent overuse injuries. I did HIIT on my treadmill, workout videos from YouTube, and went for a walk outside. The snow is melting here in Alaska and I am so happy for summer to begin. 


Disclaimer: All content and media on the Hoping For Baby website is created and published online for informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice and should not be relied on as health advice.


Catch-up on Previous Weight Loss Series Posts

Weight Loss Series Week 1: Fertility Clinic Closed, Focusing on Health

Weight Loss Series Week 2: 100 Miles in April Challenge & Online Infertility Group

Weight Loss Series Week 3: The Difference & BFFs with My Treadmill


Countdown Until Target Weight Date: 5 months & 9 days (as of 4-21-2020)


Week 4


Variety is the Spice of Life

As you read in my intro, it is really important to do a variety of different exercises. I think this is especially true for anyone that is in the beginning stages of their weight loss journey and they may not have built up enough strength yet. In the past I would be super gung-ho about getting back into an exercise routine that I would sometimes get an injury from overdoing it. Whether it was shin splints, achilles tendinitis or even a sprained ankle, I was notorious for ending up hurt not too long after I started my new exercise routine. 



On our walk Sunday afternoon. Coastal trail with city of Anchorage, Alaska in background. See more photos on our Instagram.


I decided that this time around I wanted to be more calculated with my exercise routine to avoid injury. Firstly, I started slow. I was sedentary for so long that I started off moving more by simply cleaning the house. It got me off my butt and moving. The following week I started walking slowly, then the next week I incorporated more of a light jog. This last week I have been doing a variety of exercises. Even my cardio routine looks different each day. I’ve been doing strength training too, several times a week. I’m trying to be very conscious of focusing on exercising different parts of my body throughout the week. For example, upper body strength training one day and lower body the next. 



Cook Inlet during “Spring Breakup” where chunks of ice are starting to melt.  See more photos on our Instagram.


I can feel I’m getting stronger and stronger each day. My arms are in the beginning stages of starting to tone up and my stomach is slowly starting to get a little smaller. It’s cool to already see a few changes. I’m looking forward to seeing how many inches I’ve lost by the end of the month.



Virtual DIY Walk of Hope

I am looking forward to participating in the Virtual Walk of Hope, as part of National Infertility Awareness Week (NIAW) through RESOLVE. If you didn’t know, NIAW is April 19th through the 25th. Although money is kind of tight for me at the moment with my reduced hours at work, I’ve decided to pledge 50 cents for every mile I walk this week.  Check out how you can participate by going to their website. My goal is to walk at least 20 miles over these next seven days. Let me know if you are also participating in the Virtual Walk of Hope and what your goals are for this walk. 



Currently in Alaska we are still allowed to walk outside during the pandemic but we must be 6 feet away from others, except for household members. Now that it’s warming up outside I’m looking forward to sharing more of my walks and hikes outside with you all. Follow me on Instagram as I get outside and walk and hike here in beautiful Alaska.


Screenshot 2020-04-20 at 11.00.45 AM

My progress for the 100 Miles in April challenge so far.



Last week’s weight 189.0, this weeks is 187.4 lbs. (1.6 lbs lost this week)


Screenshot 2020-04-20 at 11.12.50 AM



Mini Victories for the Week

Continuing with the momentum of my workout routine.

Knowing when to rest when my body is tired from exercising.

Did not go over my 1200 calories per day at all this week.


Work in Progress

I got outside once this week, would definitely like to do more of this.

Find a new trail to walk on this week that I haven’t been on before.

Weight Loss Series Week 3: The Difference & BFFs with My Treadmill

Weight Loss Series Week 3: The Difference & BFFs with My Treadmill

When it comes to losing weight I’m going with the KISS principle, “Keep it Simple, Stupid.” I’m eating less and moving more. This week I worked my ass off. I exercised a lot more than I normally do. I’ve been doing one to two hours per day. I’m happy to see my hard work being reflected in this week’s weight loss results. I followed my 1200 calorie per day diet too. Although I haven’t quite hit the 21-day mark yet, I feel like I’m already developing healthier habits and seeing some changes in myself. 


Disclaimer: All content and media on the Hoping For Baby website is created and published online for informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice and should not be relied on as health advice.


Catch-up on Previous Weight Loss Series Posts

Weight Loss Series Week 1: Fertility Clinic Closed, Focusing on Health

Weight Loss Series Week 2: 100 Miles in April Challenge & Online Infertility Group

Countdown Until Target Weight Date: 5 months & 13 days (as of 4-14-2020)


Weight Loss Series (2)


The Difference

Not only am I beginning to see the changes in my weight, but I’m feeling it too. I feel it emotionally and physically. One meditative habit I’ve been trying to do more lately is positive visualization. One visualization I like to do when I’m on my treadmill is that I picture myself running somewhere outside, and I’m shedding my skin like a snake does. Each step forward as I’m jogging is another step closer to the person I see myself becoming. I’m shedding my past and the bad habits that led me to become overweight. I’m shedding the belief that I can’t do it. I’m now seeing myself achieving things I didn’t think were possible. It’s a visualization that I am trying to make my reality. I can’t wait to be on the other side of all of this.


Screenshot 2020-04-13 at 11.13.41 PM

Completed 44.9 miles in the 100 Mile Challenge so far this month.


I’m already feeling better in different ways. My core strength seems to be improving and I definitely feel way less bloated. Most of my fat is in my stomach, so to feel it starting to shrink is a pretty nice feeling. The other day I was walking around and I kept having to pull up my pants, which is a good problem to have if you are trying to lose weight. But I think the biggest and best change I’m experiencing is that I no longer feel depressed. I think when someone deals with multiple stressors over time and they do nothing but sit sedentary for so long, I truly believe that negative energy accumulates until it reaches a toxic point. 

I think I was just sitting in that toxic state for so long and it was hard for me to pull myself out of the deep rut I was in. I was dealing with a mostly physical and somewhat emotional depression for a few months. But I am surprised that I feel so different now. With exercising more I’m getting all those “feel good” chemicals flowing through my brain. My life isn’t devoid of stressors now, but I look forward to exercising to let off some steam instead of seeking out comfort food.


BFFs with My Treadmill

I know some people despise using a treadmill, but during this pandemic I am feeling really thankful I have my treadmill here at home. I’ve been jamming out to my music and doing mostly HIIT (high-intensity interval training) this week on my treadmill. I’m pleasantly surprised at how I’m able to run longer than I thought I could. Each time I workout I try to push myself out of my comfort zone just a little bit more. In the past I was the Queen of the Comfort Zone, and avoided anything other than a 30-minute walk. But I’m glad I am building on each success with a new mini-challenge. 


5 miles... Not too shabby.


Why do I like my treadmill so much? I can use my incline and it also has arm bars, this helps to mix up my workout a bit. When I’m not running full-throttle jamming out to my music, I’ll slow it down to read or watch a TV show on my Kindle Fire. Or I’ll be playing on my phone checking Instagram (follow me @hopingforbabyblog). Essentially I’m doing all the same stuff that I used to do except I’m not sitting on my ass to do it, I’m up and moving on the treadmill. Those are some of the main reasons my treadmill and I are BFFs now. 



Last week’s weight was 193.4, now I’m down to 189.0 lbs. Lost 4.4 lbs this week.


Screenshot 2020-04-13 at 8.03.49 PM

Mini Victories for the Week

Created variety in my exercise routine; treadmill, HIIT, weightlifting, and yoga.

Keeping up with my April 100 mile challenge fairly well. 

Sleeping better this week.


Work in Progress

Try to schedule regular workout time rather than doing it at random times.

Include some dance workouts from YouTube this upcoming week.

Dust off the Just Dance games and start doing this for fun. 

Try to have Kurtis join in with me for different workouts rather than always doing it solo.

Weight Loss Series Week 2: 100 Miles in April Challenge & Online Infertility Group

Weight Loss Series Week 2: 100 Miles in April Challenge & Online Infertility Group

Are you up for a challenge? I joined the 100 Miles in May challenge, which now includes a bonus month of April. I decided to join this challenge as a way to stay active during the COVID-19 pandemic, and it just so happens to coincide with my Weight Loss Series here on HopingForBaby.com. Whether you track your miles, steps, or hours I encourage you to challenge yourself beyond your normal exercise routine. 


Disclaimer: All content and media on the Hoping For Baby website is created and published online for informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice and should not be relied on as health advice.


Catch-up on Previous Weight Loss Series Posts

Weight Loss Series Week 1: Fertility Clinic Closed, Focusing on Health


Countdown Until Target Weight Date: 5 months & 24 days (as of 4-6-2020)


Weight Loss Series (1)


100 Miles in April Challenge

My work is participating in a local fundraising event called 100 Miles in May. The organizers of the event decided to add on a bonus month to include the month of April. So that’s a challenge of 100 miles for April and then another 100 miles in May. Even if I don’t make the 100 miles in April, I’m hoping that I will be able to build up enough endurance in April to be able to handle the 100 miles in May. Everyone I work with is on our company team, and for every mile we all walk our company will donate to the fundraiser. 



I figured I could do about three miles per day for the 30 days that are in April. I have a treadmill at home I’ve been neglecting so I figured now is a perfect time to make use of it since I am working less hours during this COVID-19 pandemic. After my first workout I had already developed a blister on my heal. Really now? On day one I get a blister?! I thought to myself that if that is any indication of how this month was going to go I was in for a long road ahead. But for some reason my shoe was messed up and it was pushing into my heal. I pushed back really hard on that part of my shoe to bend it out. The next time I worked out, I had no issues whatsoever. I had also put a bandaid over my heal for my next workout to let it heal a bit. 

I missed one day of exercise and thought, “Oh I’ll do six miles today to make up for the day I missed.” Girl, let me tell you I was wiped out after doing that! I was essentially useless for the rest of the day and laid out on the couch saying to my husband, “Oh my gawwd I’m sooo tired!” I slept pretty well that night, which was a very good thing because I was having a hell of a time sleeping these past couple weeks.

When you are out of shape and suddenly take on a six mile challenge of intermittent walking and jogging, it is not easy. It helped me to realize I cannot go overboard right out of the gates and I need to take a more reasonable approach. I think 3-4 miles per day is more doable goal for me at this point in time, eventually I’d like to build on that as I get into better shape. 



Screenshot 2020-04-06 at 1.57.07 PM

Credit: Healthy Futures Screenshot of my progress so far of 9 miles for April.


Online Infertility Group

Focusing on physical health is important during these times, as well as mental health too. I’m trying to balance my mind, body, and spirit as a holistic way to improve my health. Part of this approach includes continuing with my infertility support group I recently joined. This week the group decided to do their meeting online using Facebook Messenger due to our state’s mandate of closing down all non-essential activities, in an effort to reduce cases of COVID-19.

I opted not to show my face on camera for this meeting, seeing as how I had no makeup on and my hair was pretty disheveled. It was cool that there were a handful of us participating and sharing how we are all handling the pandemic and the cancellations of fertility treatments during this time. It was nice to know I wasn’t alone with my feelings of disappointment as I was learning to come to terms with the situation. Even though I didn’t really feel up to doing the group initially that night because I was feeling kind of “blah,” I was happy that I decided to join in. They are all such nice and understanding women. I feel like they really get me and I totally understand where they are coming from as well. 

In one of the bigger infertility groups I’m a part of on Facebook that has tens of thousands of participants, I asked them if they knew of other online video-conferencing groups that have started up due to social distancing. I will let you all know what I find out and will most likely put on my page Resources & Products but it may take a little while to gather that info, so keep checking back. 

I was invited to join the national infertility support group called Sarah’s Laughter: Christian Support for Infertility and Child Loss but I opted for the local group meeting for this month. I might check out their national group next month. If you are interested in participating in their national group you can do so through Facebook. Here are the instructions they have on their Facebook page for how to get invited: “Private message or email (beth@sarahs-laughter.com) for link and Info on how to log on.” (Sarah’s Laughter, 2020). If you want to learn more about the group first you can also check out their website sarahs-laughter.com. I’m not particularly religious, but they are welcoming of everyone, regardless of faith. 


This weeks weight loss progress, from 195.2 to 193.4 pounds.


Screenshot 2020-04-06 at 11.53.59 AM

Mini Victories for the Week

Lost 1.8 pounds this week. 

Making use of my treadmill now.

Participated in the infertility group meeting online.

Ate 1200 calories every day except one day this week.


Work in Progress

Schedule a regular exercise time and stick to it for the week.

Reduce junk food, had some on Sunday.


Weight Loss Series Week 1: Fertility Clinic Closed, Focusing on Health

Weight Loss Series Week 1: Fertility Clinic Closed, Focusing on Health

Have your fertility treatments been cancelled due to COVID-19? The uncertainty of infertility treatments is hard enough, and now we face the uncertainty of the COVID-19 situation. Now is the time to focus on what matters most, our health. I recently read that having a higher BMI can increase your risk for having complications from COVID-19. Not too long ago I also read that a higher BMI reduces fertility treatment success. I feel like now, more than ever, I need to get my ass in gear and make some major health changes to lower my high BMI. Due to my fertility treatment cancelling my FET procedure, I am shifting my focus from my FET Prep Series to instead my Weight Loss Series. The weight loss series will be individualized to my own experience, and you are welcome to follow along. 


Disclaimer: All content and media on the Hoping For Baby website is created and published online for informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice and should not be relied on as health advice.


Countdown Until Target Weight Date: 6 months & 1 day (as of 3-31-2020)


Weight Loss Series


Let me be real with you, I did not feel fully prepared for my FET (originally scheduled April 24th, now cancelled) as much as I wanted to be. My weight has been an issue off and on over the years. My last round of IVF left me feeling extra bloated and I struggled to lose the weight from the hormones I was on. My weight crept up with each infertility treatment, each miscarriage, each surgery, and was compounded even more so with the depression I was experiencing. I kept thinking that my body would somehow magically bounce back to my pre-infertility treatment weight, but it never did. 


I can’t blame it all on my infertility treatments though, but I can definitely blame my habits. In order to deal with the stress of everything going on, I became more relaxed with how I was eating. “Fast food today isn’t that big a deal” I would tell myself. Instead of cooking at home I was starting to replace more meals with eating takeout often. Unhealthy food and being a couch potato is a surefire way to pack on the pounds. 


But with COVID-19 I had no choice but to make more meals at home. I started eating more veggies and fruits and making healthy dinners. I’m still working, but it’s significantly less hours now. So with my extra time I decided this first week I wanted to really focus on cleaning the house and being active that way. I accomplished quite a bit of reorganizing and cleaning. My measurement of a successful active day was whether I broke a sweat cleaning for at least an hour. As I was cleaning I was either listening to upbeat music, a podcast, or an audio book. Once I get into it, the cleaning process was actually pretty therapeutic for me.


On March 21st, 2020 I weighed myself, the scale flashed 200.6 pounds. It’s not the heaviest I’ve ever been, but it’s damn near it. At my heaviest I was 220 pounds years ago. But I’m facing the facts now, and I’m realizing my situation is serious. I have high blood pressure and I’m pre-diabetic, both of which are reversible. It seemed like it was just a few months ago I was only 180 pounds. 



My starting weight of 200.6 (March 21st) to today 195.2 (March 31st).


My last miscarriage was September 2019, which required me to have a total of three surgeries due to complications from the first surgery. My depression increased with each surgery. I had zero control over the situation, there was simply nothing I could do other than follow doctors orders. I had to continuously postpone my FET plans with each surgery. Now with COVID-19 it has been postponed again. 


But instead of sinking into a deeper depression and gaining more and more weight I decided enough was enough. Sometimes I tell myself, “I’m going to do the opposite of what I feel like doing today.” Instead of spending an entire day escaping by binge watching Netflix like I wanted to do, I focused on cleaning the house instead. With the consistent daily movement I started to feel better. I didn’t feel quite ready at the time to hop on the treadmill again, and I wanted to ease into exercising by cleaning the house first. I’m feeling much better this week physically and emotionally, and I feel like I am ready to start actively exercising again. 


I’m hoping to lose about 50 pounds over six months, give or take. So by October 1st I’d like to have shaved off quite a bit of weight. Even if I don’t reach my exact goal I think any amount of weight loss is better than the weight-gain trajectory I was on. I have no idea how long the COVID-19 fertility clinic closures will last, so I might as well focus my energy into becoming healthier. 


Have you decided to focus on improving your health while you are waiting for your fertility clinic to reopen? If so, I’d love to hear the steps you are taking to take care of yourself. Whether you are focusing on your physical health or mental health (or both) please comment below. 


Mini Victories for the Week

Cleaned the house daily.

Lost 5.4 pounds already!


Work in Progress

Work out on the treadmill this upcoming week. 

Focus on 1200 calorie/day.

Start with 5 minutes of meditation daily.


ticker week 1

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