(Entry written prior to posted date).

 

My doctor said I might need at least one more day on meds. I actually want one or two more days anyway so I use up my remaining meds and so I can grow these smaller eggs a bit more. The problem is I have one really big egg that my body might release  if it gets too much bigger. I’m waiting for a call back this afternoon about whether I will trigger tonight or not.

 

Later that day…

 

I got the phone call in a Whole Foods of all places. I kept zig-zagging away from the hangry customers in the self-serve hot food area, they all but pushed me out of the way to get to their food. I wanted yell at all the as***les around me. Those entitled boojie people kept getting too damn close while I had one finger in my ear and my other ear is trying to hear my doctor over the loud store intercom that incessantly announces Thanksgiving deals. What I managed to make out was this, “You have four eggs on your right side, two on the left, and only three are mature.” I thought to myself, not too bad, considering my last round I had less to work with.

 

“We have a couple of options. We can cancel the IVF cycle. Or we can wait a few more days.” Cancel it?! No way! I’ve put so much money into this. My one egg is 19mm so it’s pretty big. But I have a handful of other ones that look promising. They are concerned I’m going to lose that egg or even more if I keep going. But they said the chance of that happening is less than 5%. I told her I wanted to continue. So I will be back in two days for another ultrasound.

 

This round has been particularly nerve racking and has already had many ups and downs. Despite the near heart attack in the Whole Foods today I managed to get my sh** together and make a decision to move forward and continue my medicine. It’s kind of a cruel experiment when you think about it, spend tens of thousands of dollars on IVF that make our bodies go bazerk in every way and expect us to be calm and decisive with major decisions. You show me a woman who has kept her sh** together during her IVF cycle and I’ll show you a liar.

 

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